had a sad day spent listening to music and ignoring my cellphone.

I’m not totally mad at you. I’m just sad. You’re all locked up in that little world of yours, and when I try knocking on the door, you just sort of look up for a second and go right back inside.
—Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood (via larmoyante)

I want it but at the same time I want the opposite.
I want to be alone but also i don’t.
I want to talk but also remain quiet.
I want to go out but also stay at home.
I want to enjoy company but I’m scared.

So hard to express your feelings if you have social phobia.
It’s more then being scared of meeting people.

People who never experienced it will never understand.
It’s sick torture. Ruining your life. And makes everything 10x times harder.
It goes along with you for your entire life.
You can’t hide cause it’s deep within.

—Hinterkopf. (via c17h23no2)